Powerful Connections

The concept “Demonstration of High(er) Value” can be split up into several sub-categories, and in this post I will focus on the verbal part.

In terms of classic PUA (pick up artist) definition, verbal DHV stories are those you tell to build interest and / or attraction towards your persona from another persona. If you browse the Powerful Attraction Model, you will find that we do not include DHV stories anywhere, as we assume value in the opener. However, I do acknowledge that you need to know which topics to talk about to let a girl know just how lucky she is to be in your company!

When I talk with women, I hold back the stories about myself until we are in the Qualify/Relate stages of our interaction, as I want to make sure that she has invested first. This is in stark contrast to other philosophies, in which you are likely recommended to state your value quickly. Again, let me refer to my previous statement: You have value because you opened! You will display further value only if she is interesting enough to do so.

In general, there are four key areas that you will want to know and be able to adress:

• You are preselected
• You are a leader of your social circle
• You do things that excite you
• You have high standards

When do you want to deliver a DHV?

From personal experience I can tell you that you can walk up to a group, pull away a girl and just start off with a justification of why (if you need to) and then ask her a value-based question like: “Are you a cool person?” Listen, take mental notes, and then relate using one of the four key areas. Or, you can vibe with the group and ask someone in the group (not her) about what they do for fun - when they reply with one single word (even it is “why?”), you have opened the conversation thread and you can now relate:

Being preselected is all about letting the girl know that you are used to being with hot girls, so she can expect you to know how to treat her right and not go all loser-like on her. Preselection also relates to the concept “social proof” - if you are seen talking and having social fun with lots of people at a place, you will unconsciously be attributed higher value… An example of how I would do this is to out loud compare the reply to someting one of my female friends would think, discover why it’s interesting, and somewhere along the way convey why I hold that female as a friend: “wow, you’re right, that IS cool. One of my ex girlfriends says the same thing. People tend to judge her on her looks and fear approaching her, and it tears her up inside. I guess it’s not all that easy to be a model.”

Being a leader of your social circle is all about letting her know that you are fully capable of leading an interesting life without her, and also to get her thinking that you have cool friends, because as the saying goes: You can tell who people are through the company they keep. An example: “That’s cool?!?? I took out  one of my friends who runs a company that does X , and he says the exact same thing. I don’t get it, but I respect it.” - In doing this you also set up a possibility for her to qualify herself, in convincing you that what you are talking about IS cool. Personally I do not talk about this area, as I will apply social dynamic tactics instead, following the “don’t tell it, show it” maxim.

You will want to do and talk about things that are exciting to you. This is important, as it fuels your state, and it lets her know that you enjoy your life. It also lets her know what she’s in for if she hangs around for a longer period of time. “Yeah, that is cool. One of the coolest things I know is to do X. I feel so alive when I do it that [...]” - Really get into that state, and know that it is not important if she relates to your words - she is relating to your subcommunication.

In conveying your standards, you are subconsciously letting her know that you will not be chosen by her; it is a mutual decision, and she has to have certain personality features for you to be attracted to her. You are signalling many things in doing this, and one key application in my model of the world is to subtly convey what is or is not acceptable behavior between the two of us later on. An example from my world would be extensive use of preframing for what’s going to happen after we agree to exchange phone numbers, and then use callbacks to what we have talked about when I do close.

I’ll quite often say something like: “Don’t you just hate it when you give a guy his phone number, and he texts you the next day? … [response] … I love indepent people. When I give out my phone number to someone it’s because I find them interesting or attractive or sexy and intend to see them again within two weeks, … and patience is the key!”

Now, if you are experienced in seducing women, you will have guessed that the girl will pick up on that thread and start qualifying herself, either instantly or later on - and the second she ”competes” for your interest or starts relating to what you find attractive or sexy, you are good in taking her number or moving ahead to something more…

Stay tuned for the next post on nonverbal DHV.