This past week has been really interesting in many ways. I have found myself in front of my computer until the late hours of the morning doing stuff that might help set up future spiritual, emotional and financial income. Wow, … Big one.
Today, doing my daily 20 minutes of blog scanning, I stumbled upon a goldmine. Before sharing it with you, let me tell you my insights from some extensive soul searching.
Why do I put so much pressure on myself? How is it that I have found it hard to motivate myself into taking action right now?
I was in a relationship with a magnificent woman until recently. In spite of any issues we may have had, I was sure this was the woman that was the match for me… Intelligent, caring, beautiful, fucked up to some extent, attractive and independent. The one person I have yet to meet and open up to completely. Had it not been for her, I would not have chosen a path of life that involved self-employment. Most likely, I would have ignored my son completely, if she had not persistantly “coached” (pressured me kindly) to take action.
It has been a relationship with lots of great moments. Like every couple, we have had our differences, and we always found a way to meet each other. I remember one key dominant sentence throughout: I hate it when people decide to quit just because they can’t figure out what to do. Maybe it’s just me being stubborn but, I am used to winning. You don’t win by quitting - you win by changing directions.
Somewhere, deep inside me, the desire to win is rooted in a fear of being abandoned, which is rooted in my need to feel certainty. As I look back in my life, I suddenly realize that many of my most stupid choices have roots in that need.
If you’re headed towards the edge of the cliff with full momentum, it won’t do you any good to slam the brakes. You need to change your heading. - Former CEO of a Danish phone company
When you cannot figure out what to do, it is because you have a dream that you are yet to fully verbalize. If you give up when things heat up, you give up that dream. If you do not possess the flexiblity to look inside yourself and figure out how your behavior is creating or amplifying the problem, so you can change your situation, then you’re quitting! Well, now I know the name of my fear behind that belief, and actually I feel liberated from it as I am sharing this with you.
The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, while expecting different results every time you do it. -Tony Robbins
Just the other day I was in a radio talkshow with a female dating expert. It was great fun, oddly enough we agreed on 90 % of the questions, and actually I enjoyed the post-show talk even more.
I was surprised and happy when you said that there is no point in using predefined pickup lines. Honestly, I had expected you to pull out a list with the 10 most effective ones! - Danish female dating expert Julie Badura
We had some great talks about female and male mindsets and how the American dating culture is becoming more dominant in the Nordic countries. We also talked about how we sometimes abandon our real dreams in pursuit of monetary happiness, and how this effects our lives later on. I felt inspired as I drove back to my house.
This, and my past relationship, reminded me of the movie “Click!” with Adam Sandler. For the past 12 months I have worked close to 80 hours a week, in pursuit of my dream to build a company that would help people achieve their spiritual and emotional dreams. I have focused on these people with the guiding principle: “If I show my clients I care, more clients will come.” Admirable standards to live and do business by, right? Well, here’s the problem: I neglected my own personal long-term emotional growth. I forgot to stay grounded. The very things that my girlfriend had helped inspire me to accomplish would be the key sources to our downfall.
In the last 30 days, I have been feeling good. However, I have not been able to find the drive that is my character signature if you ask my friends and business associates. Until today, as I woke up thinking: “If only she were here. I did it all to build our future, and she is not here anymore.”
Well, she is NOT here anymore, and that is EXACTLY why I need to keep my momentum going. I just need to remember the movie “Click!” in the process. I want to stay grounded and care for my friends and myself, as I am living the dream I am building. Right now!
Always remember to put on your own oxygen mask before helping others… -Airline emergency instruction video
So that’s it. No flashy remarks. No snappy comebacks from the Grand Old Man of the Danish PUA community. Just me exposing my core so that hopefully someone, somewhere, can feel inspired to do the same… Which leads me back to the most inspiring blog I came across this week. Check out Erika’s blog, and notice the positivity and honesty in her words.
Let’s make this the great day.
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