Wednesday, September 8, 2010

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Archive for the ‘Escalation Techniques’ Category

Stealthy KINO Moves - Part II

Posted by anderstryka On January - 17 - 2010

About a month ago I wrote a guest article at PUA Lingo called “Stealthy KINO Moves.” The article was about the majority of the “secret” little moves I use and teach my clients in-field, such as:

  • The Shoulder Tap
  • The Finger Tap
  • Hand on Waist
  • The Compliance Test
  • The Finger Pull
  • The Belly Rub
  • The Rapport Mis-Match

These moves are all very subtle and, when done correctly, undetectable on a conscious level as seductive moves. If you are new to seduction and PUA terminologies, KINO is defined as “physical touch of someone” and it is one of – if not THE most important – non-verbal communication aspects of the PUA.

One of the commenter’s over at PUA Lingo duly notes that I left out the touch of the biceps, and that this move is also extremely powerful as stroking a biceps gently releases sexual neurons. I agree, it is indeed strongly related to the argument I state for using the Belly Rub. However, I do not use that move myself, I personally opt for the triceps.

To me, the triceps area is more accessible when standing, and since my KINO moves are all about stealth, that’s where my choices have brought me. Also, the triceps move is one I save for later stages; (very) gently stroking a woman over her triceps is so intimate that it has caused a lot of women to get shivers down their spine.
When I use it socially, it is usually the last thing I do before entering the make-out stages of interaction. When alone, it almost takes on a foreplay introduction role.

The “Corkscrew” Move

corkscrewThe “corkscrew” is one of my most “secret” moves that is KINO related which, up until now, I have only taught the clients I coach in-field. It’s a move mainly designed for optimizing set position, and it’s usable in both bar, club and street environments. I first learned about the basic move from witnessing the legendary Croatian PUA “BadBoy” as he was in action and refined it later on using aspects of the foot-sweep technique from Karate.

 

The ingredients of this move are very simple. All it requires is feet positioning, hands around her waist and the turn of your head.

You’ll want to use the corkscrew if, for one reason or the other, you want to turn another person away from something or someone without that person ever noticing it – which is why I mainly use this move on the street, where the most important logistical thing to do in the first minute or two is to get your target turned in the opposite direction in the attempt to divert her focus away from where she was going, thereby making it easier for yourself to carry the first crucial moments of conversation.

How to do a “Corkscrew”

The move is simply demonstrated “live” – I’ll see if I can’t get up a video for you. For now though, let me explain it in writing:

Person A (you) and Person B (the girl) are standing next to each other, facing in the same direction, bodies slightly pointed towards each other. Person B is standing to your right. When you normally stand like this, your feet are planted next to each other.

You can get her to turn by asking questions and pointing backwards, at first with your right hand, then with both hands or your left hand (over your right shoulder) – assuming the rapport is good, she will follow your gestures and you will effectively turn and face the opposite direction, her now to your right. That’s the “old school” way of doing it, and it works many times however, it’s obvious and it’s try-hard. I don’t do try-hard, and I don’t do obvious.

Start as you would with slight KINO (touch of arm or shoulder) as you move closer. Move your right foot back one step, then go for the waist, but:

Instead of moving your right foot back, planting it next to her left foot, step it in right behind her and plant the inside of your right foot no more than an inch from the inside of her left heel. Your foot must be on the inside of her foot, effectively locking in the two of you together. Avoid touching her foot as this would otherwise direct her attention to you making a move.

Position recap: Your right hand around her waist, your right foot positioned inside her left foot.

Now what you do is both simple and sneaky: Instead of the “old school” way, you move your head to your left as you are talking and take a step back with your left foot, and turn your right foot until it touches her left foot. Keep your hand on her waist to create a slight pressure point that will direct her to move forward. However, “forward” in this position is converged on your “corkscrew center” (your feet) and you are effectively using your head turning left to turn your torso, which then directs your right arm to apply pressure to her waist whilst supporting her at the same time, causing her to “circle” the center.

Keep your right foot planted on the ground as you move, only lift it if you sense that she is in an uncomfortable position (or to avoid twisting your knee!). If the girl does not circle around the center of the corkscrew, lift the front of your right foot and gently touch her foot with your toes (because you are moving your head, she will not consciously notice the foot touch, but she WILL move).

This technique works because of the slight pressure and very solid lock-in, combined with the fact that you are turning your head away as you speak. To make it dead-sure, only turn your head mid-sentence, and preferably as you are asking her a question, as this will engage her more.

Mastering the corkscrew will enable you to turn anyone in any social setting; it works extremely well on the street if your rapport work is good, and it’s also a lot of fun to do wingmen mirror versions.

Now, go out there and un-screw some corks!

Oh, PS: If you are dying to read about the moves I mention in the introduction of this article, feel free to visit the original PUA Lingo article.

Anti-Slut Defense (ASD)

Posted by anderstryka On May - 28 - 2009

A reader asked me why the field reports on this site generally end without me closing the deal 100 % - there has been one exception in a field report was written by Martin one of our coaches at Powerful Attraction.

Actually, NOT posting about SNL’s (same night lays) ONS’s (one night stands) and STR’s (short-term relationships) has been a conscious choice of mine for quite some time. The reason behind the choice is quite simple - it relates to some of my key priciples in being a pickup coach.

sluts1When writing up field reports, I have two main concerns; one is PUA driven, the other is moral and motivation driven. The PUA driven side is mainly an expression of my desire to post-analyze what went down and to share my learning with you. And then again, there is a deeper meaning to it:

The good pickup artist (PUA) knows that in escalating a relationship with any woman to the point of a relationship (in PUA terms everything before the point of intercourse is defined as no relationship), he will often have to walk the woman through her anti slut defense (ASD). Good PUA’s know that women love sex and one of the key elements standing between you and sex is your ability to convey to the woman that sleeping with you will not imply her being a slut; cheap, or easy if you will. So, for sex to happen, among other things you have to provide her a way to not seem like a slut, simple as that.

What is ASD? 

Women will build guilt by having sex too quickly with a man, which is something that society would often call “slutty behavior.” Assuming she has enough time to think about the consequences - ASD is a reaction causing her to come up with reasons that she shouldn’t have sex with you in order to relieve her of taking responsibility for doing what she really wants to do. If left undealt with, the ASD will lead to last minute resistance (LMR) in bed, which in turn leads to no sex or, later on, to a girl flaking on you by suddenly being unable to meet (with little or no warning), or not taking your calls. 

How to deal with ASD

Handling the ASD response is one of the most central issues for a PUA. ASD is the reason we isolate her from the pack before escalating. ASD is the reason we do verbal take-aways after delivering our statement of (sexual) intent. If you ask me, ASD is the driving mechanism behind 70 % of the accumulated PUA material out there today. That’s how important this topic is.

What you really need to do to deal with the ASD is create a sense of certainty in her mind. At some point during the interaction your conversation will inevitably turn to sex and at that point she needs to know that you are experienced, yet not the bragging type. In other words, she needs to know that you know and can provide what she wants and you don’t kiss and tell. 

Heck, I once knew a girl that would only have sex with married men because: “Who the hell are they going to tell without risking a divorce!”

In this day and age, everybody reads everything on the internet - hell, my mom is probably reading this blog post, too! (hi mom!). I’m pretty sure that many of the girls I date read these blog posts, and I do not want to expose any of them. (Oh, if you thought we were exclusive: you never got that idea from me!) 

So, back to the “how” in this: Provide a safety net for the girl by isolating her from her friends. At some point, stress that you understand her for not showing who she REALLY wants to be around men when her friends are close by. Whenever she backs down in escalation, I strongly suggest that you acknowledge her socially driven response with words like “You are right, we shouldn’t be doing this…”  and then ASSUME FULL RESPONSIBILTY by saying stuff like: “you’re just too damn hot, I can’t help it…” True masters proceed with a true talent for acting it out, … “But no.. you’re right… so, as I was saying…” and then talk as if nothing had happened while escalating non-verbally. 

No-sex FR’s from a moral perspective

In terms of motivation and learning I have always found stories with unhappy endings to be the ones that inspired me the most. Sure, I’ve written many lay reports earlier in my life, all high on the adrenaline that can only be achieved through the feeling of having accomplished a desired outcome. Actually, I’m writing a (free) e-book with some of the best stories from my PUA life, most of these end up in a “relationship.”

I’ll tell you more about that project when the time comes - for now, let me get to the second point of the subject at hand:

Ever since the seduction community exploded in active participants and curious followers we have seen a similar growth in focus on externally validated results. 2007 and most of 2008 was all about who could hook up with most girls in a year; who was fastest from approach to sex, who could do the fastest makeout after initial eye-contact. I’m not judging anyone. In fact, I used to live that very same way. What dawned on me along the way was: Living your life as a slave of external validation has nothing to do with giving value to the girls you meet. It has absolutely nothing to do with achieving personal growth. 

I believe that we learn faster by analyzing how things didn’t play out as planned, and I believe that there is no real achievement in boasting about successful external results. This blog is all about conveying the importance of being congruent with your core traits and sticking to your inner values, while at the same time respecting women and adding value to their lives. 

I hope you can read the above moral standpoint between the lines of all present and future field reports found on this blog.

You are more than welcome to leave a comment or share this article using the share button below before you go out there and choose to make this day a great one!